WARNING! Residents of Phu Nhuan District, Saigon are advised to stay behind locked doors until further notice. Seen earlier this evening terrorizing small businesses on Phan Xich Long St., this 2-year old gun-toting tot patrolled the street, demanding free fruit smoothies and a nappy change. Shit-scared pedestrians described her as "unhinged", "cute", "adorable" and "a bit stinky". Local SWAT teams are en route as I post. Take care out there!
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